Small worlds and groundhogs

Thursday morning tidbits . . .

The Associated Press reported Tuesday that a disabled man who was stuck on the Disneyland ride “It’s A Small World” for three hours in 2009 was awarded $8,000 for pain and suffering.

And – before you ask – yes, that irritating little song played the entire time. The ride was broken, the sound was not.

The guy should have gotten a million bucks.

The lawyer in the case says the victim suffers from panic attacks and high blood pressure and had to urinate for a lot of the time he was on the ride. It is hard to imagine a worse pain. Imagine sitting there with your legs crossed, listening to:

“It’s a small world after all, it’s a small world after all. It’s a small world after all . . . it’s a small, small world.” Over and over and over and over . . .

We’re having a panic attack just thinking about it.

Elsewhere . . .

Punxsutawney Phil, the famous Pennsylvania groundhog/weather forecaster, is off the hook for falsely predicting an early spring.

A wire service story said the head of the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club’s Inner Circle misinterpreted Phil’s “Groundhogese” on Feb. 2 and that the little rodent was really signaling six more weeks of winter. Despite using his magical “Arcadian” cane while Phil whispered in his ear, the handler blew it.

Furthermore, the Groundhog Club leader said this is the second year in a row he got Phil’s forecast wrong.

It apparently is very hard to find a good interpreter for a groundhog.

* Editorials reflect the opinion of the publisher.