One of the problems with having 12,463 channels, or thereabouts, on cable television is that there must be a program showing on all those stations.
That troubling thought occurred to us again the other night when we hit upon a channel that was airing "Alvin and the Chipmunks, the Squeakquel." Not for the first time we thought there must be divine intent in roadkill.
Those chipmunks deserved a good tire.
But, alas, some studio - somewhere - is being paid a residual as Alvin and his fellow rodents eat up some time on a channel that only bored editorial writers watch.
Wait, we know some of you will protest, "But that is wonderful children's fare." No, it isn't - it's a show guaranteed to lower the IQ of anyone who watches it by 50 points.
Your children would be better off chewing on the edge of a Little Golden Book.
We worry sometimes that television has become a babysitter. "We'll let Junior watch 'Alvin and the Chipmunks: The Squeakquel' - it will teach him compassion." Then Mom and Dad head for the lanai for a glass of wine.
We'd suggest a better way to instruct Junior. Every night, read him (or her) a chapter from "Winnie the Pooh." When you finish that, each night read a chapter from "The House at Pooh Corner."
These old books by A. A. Milne will indeed teach Junior about compassion - and what being a friend means.
By the way, at the end of each chapter, there is plenty of time for Mom and Dad to go out on the lanai and have a glass of wine.
* Editorials reflect the opinion of the publisher.