The art of 2 deals

Last week I was buying some used furniture for our new house.

ME Your prices are $175, $125 and $100. I make that $400. Will you take $350?

YOUNG MAN: I’ll get my mother. She’s the expert with the credit card. You said $300?

ME: Sure.

WBD and Kim Jung Un also were negotiating.

WBD: I insist on complete and verifiable denuclearization with inspections.


WBD: And a meeting between us as equals.


WBD: And the sanctions, they’re history.

KIM: If you say so.

WBD: Those 11,000 artillery pieces aimed at Seoul, I don’t want to hear a word about them.


WBD: And you will completely integrate with the family of nations.The DPRK, too, whoever they are.

KIM: All right.

WBD: And I will guarantee your regime.

KIM (murmuring): If you insist.

WBD: That was a tough negotiation but you hung in there like a champ. Done?

KIM: OK, everything but the denuclearization.

WBD: We had these coins made because I knew you’d have to come to terms. Isn’t it pretty?

KIM: Very elegant.

WBD: I hear those Swedish babes at the Nobel ceremonies are hot.