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Caring for older family members during crisis is always complex, especially for those caring for loved ones with dementia. Because information overload makes decision making more difficult, this article includes three sections:
1. Caregiver resources
2. Care receiver resources
3. Volunteer resources
Each section includes bite-size lists rather than narrative to limit overload. Please skip to the section that is most important and set aside the other information for another time.
Caregiver Resources
While nothing can be done to eliminate stress during a crisis there are strategies and resources available to manage some of that stress.
Breathe. Close your eyes, slowly breathe in and out for one minute. Open your eyes and choose one task to focus on.
Prioritize. Write down 3-5 tasks you need to do then choose just one to focus on.
Call family. Identify specific tasks that others can help with and then call family and ask. These may include sitting with your loved one for 1-2 hours, preparing dinner, or making phone calls.
Maui County Office on Aging. MCOA is the hub of resources for older adults and their caregivers. Their intake line is (808) 270-7775, a PDF of their Resource Directory is at https://go.hawaii.edu/V8i, or their searchable directory and all other resources are at https://www.mauicountyadrc.org/.
Maui Adult Day Care Centers (MADCC). Scholarships are available for Lahaina families. Sites include Kahului, Oceanview (Wailuku), and Kihei. While they are cared for you can focus on other priorities. Visit their website at https://www.madcc.org.
Support Group. MADCC offers monthly support groups across the island. Click on this link https://go.hawaii.edu/vAy for the 2023 schedule or call the main number and ask for Kathy Couch, (808) 871-5804.
Care Receiver Resources
For older adults with dementia, stress often exhibits itself as agitation, restlessness, worry, pacing, sleeplessness, or aggression. The following strategies can help to create a calm atmosphere.
Quiet. Dim the lights, reduce outside noise, clear clutter, and reduce the number of people in the room.
Calm. Gently touch their arm, hold their hand, play soothing music, or read to them.
Distract. Prepare a snack they enjoy, give them a photo album to look through, or have them hold an object that is meaningful.
Volunteer Resources
Many in our community who have not be directly impacted by the wildfires want to help. While some organizations are seeking volunteers, many have met their capacity and are unable to accept new volunteers. If that describes you, use the following ideas to create your own volunteer opportunities.
Identify caregivers in your circle. These may be friends, neighbors, or family who are caring for older adults.
Call and offer specific help. This may include dropping off a meal, helping with cleaning chores, visiting with the kupuna so their caregiver can take a nap, grocery shop, go to the movies, or create a playlist of the kupunaís favorite music.
Check in regularly. Call, email, or video chat with caregivers and their loved ones daily to identify new ways to help.
Thank you to all who have reached out and helped family, friends, and neighbors.
* Heather Greenwood is with the University of Hawai'i at Manoa Cooperative Extension, Maui Aging and Intergenerational Programs. "Aging Matters" covers topics of interest to the aging Maui community and appears on the third Saturday of each month.